Coming up on Everything Is Annoying

TRIVIA NIGHT

Inglorious Basterds premiere aka Angelina Jolie's femmebot face up close and personal (multitude of celebrity sightings to be listed plus terrible pictures of the red carpet and the afterparty. Did I mention I saw Angelina Jolie's face up close and personal?)

WARPAINT

Crystal making out with a sea god disguised as a surfer

Speaking of sea creatures, Meryl the Mermaid is in town from NY and staying with me next week, which means there will be some crucial Merkalating going on in my crib, which means you guys will be Merkin it up too, vicariously, through my ding dong blog.

As of today my dad's here buying me things. I mean visiting! And Crystal and I are working nonstop so I haven't had a lot of time for tale-telling but lord knows I want to. Soon old buddy old pals, soon I'll give you the goss. Just checking in. Love you!
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Emergency Dane Cook Twitter Update

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Booyaka, shabba, etc