Bad News
I talk to Ted pretty much every day (it used to be for hours a day, pathetic I know) and, well, I found out that everything you wish hope and pray guys don't talk about... they do.
I asked Ted everything I've ever wanted to know about guys but was afraid to ask. Been barreling through a tunnel of regret ever since. Guys are way more crucial about gossip than us. All we talk about is weenie-size, but guys are a bunch of hens. They talk about the things we try not to think about. I was under the impression that they pretty much think we're all hot and don't care too much if we have a touch of cellulite or baby bangs or a little hair on our arms. Welp, that was bullshit. Guys notice everything. They talk about our hoo-hoos!!
And watch what you say ladies. If you accidentally say something even remotely embarrassing their pals will hear about it. Better to just hold it all in and pretend you're perfect until the day you die, otherwise you're going to die alone.
Thank you so much for educating me Ted. I will never let anyone truly know me as long as I live, but at least I can trick someone into dying with me.
And now for some pictures from Kai Regan's website launch party. It was at former my place of employment: LIT. I have since quit serving rich artfaggy self-conscious clingons who can't take a shit without someone watching. Wait- I mean I quit bartending and have taken up a full-time job at a magazine, but more on that later. It was sponsored by Raybans, so here are some jams of my friends rocking the revival brand.
Adrea
Carlos Q.
Andrew Kuo and Me = HUGS
Brant Lee
Melanie
Erik Foss, the big boss at LIT/Fuse Gallery
Leo Fitzy
I asked Ted everything I've ever wanted to know about guys but was afraid to ask. Been barreling through a tunnel of regret ever since. Guys are way more crucial about gossip than us. All we talk about is weenie-size, but guys are a bunch of hens. They talk about the things we try not to think about. I was under the impression that they pretty much think we're all hot and don't care too much if we have a touch of cellulite or baby bangs or a little hair on our arms. Welp, that was bullshit. Guys notice everything. They talk about our hoo-hoos!!
And watch what you say ladies. If you accidentally say something even remotely embarrassing their pals will hear about it. Better to just hold it all in and pretend you're perfect until the day you die, otherwise you're going to die alone.
Thank you so much for educating me Ted. I will never let anyone truly know me as long as I live, but at least I can trick someone into dying with me.
And now for some pictures from Kai Regan's website launch party. It was at former my place of employment: LIT. I have since quit serving rich artfaggy self-conscious clingons who can't take a shit without someone watching. Wait- I mean I quit bartending and have taken up a full-time job at a magazine, but more on that later. It was sponsored by Raybans, so here are some jams of my friends rocking the revival brand.
Adrea
Carlos Q.
Andrew Kuo and Me = HUGS
Brant Lee
Melanie
Erik Foss, the big boss at LIT/Fuse Gallery
Leo Fitzy